More Pictures

http://picasaweb.google.com/jean.sandberg/CharlieAlbum2#

Here is just one picture from that album

Gassy McFarty, The Exorcist, and Meerkats

I have all kinds of cute nicknames for Charlie – Sweet Pea, Honey Bun, Cutie Pie, and my personal favorite, Monkey (he makes the cutest eee-ooo-eee noises). But sometimes I can’t help myself when he is doing his gassy thing. One time it just sort of came out of my mouth – “Hello Gassy McFarty!” Poor little guy. He’s still having gas problems and there’s not much we can do.

Charlie likes to fall asleep with his eyes half-open. The first time I saw this it freaked me out because his eyes rolled towards the back of his head and his body jerked. I couldn’t tell whether he was having a seizure or whether we needed to call an Exorcist. I am going to assume most newborns do this but I had never seen it before. The best part about this phase of sleep is that he seems to practice various emotions. He smiles and laughs, frowns and cries, all while sleeping. His sleeping smiles are huge, and he literally laughs. Marisa says if you laugh while he does this he’ll laugh more. The problem is that since his eyes are partly open, I am still unsure as to whether he has had an awake smile. I think he has, but I would not put money on it.

Every parent thinks their kid is so smart and strong and advanced for their age. But I have to say that he holds his head up quite well for a 6-week-old. My favorite burping position for him is to take one hand and hold him under his armpits (thumb in one armpit and fingers under the other)  with my palm on his chest and belly, so that he is leaning forward a little on my hand. It works well if he will sit on my leg and bend over my hand. But lately he loves to raise his head and straighten his legs so he’s standing up straight and looking around. In this position he reminds me of a Meerkat (http://www.friedmanarchives.com/Animals/images/Meerkat%208×10%20300%20dpi.jpg)  or a Prairie Dog.

Our little insomniac

Yesterday (from 3am on) Charlie was not sleeping well. Over the course of the day, he became more and more overtired until he was pretty much inconsolable. Usually he will fall asleep in your arms and transfer to the crib. Not yesterday. When that doesn’t work, he will usually be happy in the Baby Bjorn with me as I putter around the house, and fall asleep. Not yesterday. OK, I thought, I’ll just hold him for his whole nap. Usually he will happily sleep in anyone’s arms. Not yesterday. At 3:30pm I was at my wit’s end and I brought him up to EB. Usually he will happily sleep lying down next to Daddy.  Not yesterday.

No, yesterday we had to bring out the big guns. We had to do what I remember my brother-in-law Rob doing so many times during family gatherings. We had to drive Charlie around in the car. We went for a ride at about 4pm. Charlie finally went to sleep. We combined it with a run to Target, where I went in and EB drove around and around the perimeter road at the mall. We were afraid to stop completely to let me out though – I practically jumped out with the car still moving. Afterwards we went up and down 880 for a while to give Charlie more time to sleep. We went home at around 6, and brought Charlie inside in his carseat. He was dead to the world until 8 – it would have been later but it has been 5 hours since he’d eaten and also I wanted to feed him before I went to bed. Several times I had to check to make sure he was breathing.

Between the gas and the fact that it seems easy to overstimulate him, Charlie takes a long time to settle into sleep. Today I didn’t care how he got to sleep – I just wanted to make sure he actually napped so that he would not become inconsolable. I can see that this is how parents get bad habits started.

9 pounds 12 ounces

Charlie went to the pediatrician today and he’s gained 1 pound in the past 2 weeks. His height, weight, and head circumference are all following the 50th percentile trajectory. He took his 2nd hepatitis B shot like a champ. He does not appear to have reflux (yay!!) I can’t believe I’m writing about poop (isn’t that the stereotypical new parent thing to do?), but we need to keep an eye on his stool because sometimes it’s hard. Poor little guy!

Right now he’s headed to Top Dog with Dad and Marisa. Maybe when they get there, EB will say, “Someday, Charlie, this will all be yours!”

I hope to post some more pictures tonight.

Could you be a little clearer when you’re tired?

I’m talking to Charlie there. We are still trying to figure him out. The books say that we should establish a 3-hour routine for Charlie of eat-activity-sleep. They say that during the day, you want the baby to have some awake/ play time after eating so that they don’t associate sleeping with needing to eat first. They say that at this age you maybe spend 30-45 minutes playing and look for signs that he is getting tired, and then have a wind down “ritual” and put him down to sleep.

The other day I was playing with him after he ate on his jungle acivity mat, and he seemed perfectly happy – eyes wide open, legs kicking a lot. I took a video of his adorable little legs kicking away. No yawns or irritability escept for the occasional gas. (When I showed the video to EB, EB commented that this was happy kicking) But he had such a hard time going to sleep and staying asleep that day. He got very cranky later that day. Well, it appears that he gets overstimulated and in fact the kicking and wide eyes may be the signs that he is overstimulated/tired. (This is what the Baby Whisperer says. And who’s going to argue with her?) And when they are overtired they of course don’t sleep as well.

Is it so hard to ask a baby to yawn and get sleepy eyed when he’s tired?  You know, maybe some eye rubbing or something? Apparently so. Today my niece Marisa was watching him while I napped and she did the same thing I had done. She was playing with him and thought, great, he’s having more awake time, so he’ll sleep better tonight. He’s happily kicking and he looks wide awake. But he wouldn’t go down for a nap. He got all upset and only calmed after swaddling and holding him in the “side/stomach” position that the “Happiest Baby on the Block” guy advocates. (Can you tell I’m desperately reading books trying to understand what the heck to do? Mostly I am trying to understand if/how we can get him sleeping through the night before I go back to work) At this point he needs to be held until he falls into a deeper sleep before he can be put in the crib. The books say that he  needs to learn how to put himself to sleep in his crib, but I tried what they suggested and he’s either too gassy or just too stimulated to do so.

In the scheme of things, though, Charlie is GREAT and I don’t want to say any more lest I jinx things. I think we are figuring him out but everyone says that as soon as you think you’ve got something down, it changes.

Almost 1 month old!

I can’t believe Charlie will be 1 month old tomorrow. In some ways, this has been the longest month of my life. When we had been home just a few days, getting to 2 weeks seemed impossible.  That was when I was getting up every 2-3 hours to feed him. Now that we are formula feeding and I can get a full night’s sleep, things are much more manageable. (for me – it only got harder for EB, who takes the night shift. I am SO lucky he is able and willing to do that)

It feels so good to know we made it through the first month. I don’t know if I’m just spoiled by my old life or old and set in my ways (or both) but I cannot possibly imagine doing this 8 more times like my mom did. I have had challenges in my life – grad school in computer science with a bunch of people smarter than me, finding my way at Microsoft, managing chaos at Silver Spring – but this has been the hardest thing I have ever had to do.  Sometimes I wonder what my problem is because billions of women do this all the time, including 7 sisters and sisters-in-law.

Charlie is generally a good baby except that he has gas, which makes him cry.  My sister, Sue, who came out last weekend (THANK YOU SUE!) thinks the gas is pretty normal / not excessive. It’s funny how perspective is all relative. A couple of days ago, I felt like I would do anything to get rid of the gas (well, I still do) . But then yesterday was a really hard day for Charlie (and me), and I started to worry (and am still a little worried) that he has reflux, which, as it turns out, would be a worse thing than gas. He’s having a better day today, and I actually WELCOMED the normal gas fit, which is easy to identify – he pulls his knees up to his chest and bears down and it lasts only a couple of minutes. Sure, it can come back a couple of minutes later, but when you know why he is crying and know it will end, it’s not that bad. Yesterday was not like that. After 7 hours with him where he was crying half the time (and it would not go away quickly like the gas crying), I was ready to cry myself (and did later, on EB’s shoulder). He was crying more than usual and would not sleep for more than 15 minutes at a time. He was spitting up a lot and was crying during feedings, which usually doesn’t happen. I didn’t hear a lot of gas. Gas problems generally go away in 8-12 weeks, whereas reflux can take 8 months to get better. So now here I am hoping and wishing that he just has gas.

The arrival of my 24-year-old niece Marisa was a very welcome one. She is staying with us while she looks for a job, and she helps a lot by taking the baby for a few hours each day and helping out around the house.

Right now it is 80 degrees in Fremont! I took Charlie for a walk to the park this morning. I wanted to check out whether the park has baby swings (for future reference), which it does.

I guess the bottom line is that there are good days and bad days. So far today is good. Charlie had some good awake time for us to walk around and look at things and play on his mat and sing some songs. He was very cute as he looked at the things in his “activity gym” and kicked his legs. There’s not too much else to report in terms of what he’s doing He smiles in his sleep but we haven’t yet seen the awake smile.

Getting in the Blog groove

Though Jean and I were warned by just about everybody, we have still been overwhelmed at the devastation to one’s schedule that taking care of a newborn baby causes.  And it is not lost on us that we are two people (who are not working) taking care of one baby!

Anyway, we are adjusting, and we hope to be able to keep this blog more current with some normality to our schedule (and some sleep).  For starters, here is some general news of the last two weeks.

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A LITTLE MORE ABOUT THE BRIS

Both Jean and I were very nervous, and though it was very emotional, it was fulfilling.  My father Sidney (who was able to be here from Sydney) filled one of the most honorary roles of the ceremony, the “Sandek”.  (If you are interested in the traditions of brit milah and their meanings, I suggest a visit to “britmilah.com”).  It was particularly special for him because at the ceremony, Charlie was given his Hebrew name of “Yeshayahu”, after Sidney’s late father (also Charlie).  Jean and I were truly touched at the number of friends who attended, and their interest in the meaning of a strange (to them) ceremony.  Also, many of our friends took active roles, which was important to the overall spirit of the occasion.  Elisabeth shared some touching thoughts about the importance of family, which is especially appropriate since, as a social worker, she has devoted most of her adult life to that cause.  I relived some memories of my grandfather, Charlie’s namesake.  Our friend Matt read a prayer that wolrd peace might be realized in Charlie’s lifetime, and Jean managed to get through a blessing for Charlie without too much crying.  Jake and Chrissy lit the candles (candles are an important part of many Jewish rituals, including this one).  Dave and Jen honored us and Charlie by agreeing to be the “Kvatter” (Dave) and “Kvatterin” (Jen), which are analogous to “Godparents”.

It was a wonderful ceremony; thanks again to everybody who was able to share it with us, and to those who sent well wishes.

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FEEDING FRENZY

Jean and I were caught off-guard (inexplicably; we feel stupid) at how demanding it is to have a child who eats every 2-3 hours and needs you to feed him.  For the first few days, we were doing breast-feeding (“we” being mostly Jean; I have my limitations) and it was just hell-ish.  We had both read and heard stories of the meaningful bonding between mother and child during actual feeding, and the convenience of being able to feed him anytime anywhere…  It didn’t pan out that way for us.  The short of it is that Jean and I were both very sleep deprived, and that was overshadowing the whole experience of having a new-born baby.

So we’ve switched to formula, and it is going very well.  Jean is able to sleep every night, and most nights, Charlie goes to sleep after I feed him, so I can get some rest during the night and take a nap in the morning when Jean wakes up.  Charlie is doing fine with formula, except for a ltitle gassiness, and Mommy and Daddy are much more sane.

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CHARLIE’S HEALTH

Charlie had his 3 week check-up, and he’s doing great.  Since his last check-up, he has been gaining weight at about twice the average rate, but that put him in around the 50th percentile for height and weight, so it is a good thing.  He is pretty much fully recovered from the circumcision, and so he is much easier to change, and much happier between changes.  His hair is continuing to come in, and Jean says she can already notice a difference in his appearance since his first week.  He’s healthy and happy.

Different link to Snapfish pictures

I uploaded the Charlie Snapfish pictures (which many of you have already seen) to Picasa so that I could put a link here instead of having to share them from Snapfish:

http://picasaweb.google.com/jean.sandberg/CharlieSandberg#